September 28, 2005
Best news day ever! (Updated)
That is, if you love giant squids, and severely dislike Tom Delay.
So, a couple of Japanese biologists got supremely lucky when they shot the first ever video footage of a live giant squid! The giant squid, Architeuthis Dux to its friends, gets caught up in fishing nets all the time, so there's no shortage of specimens, and fishermen have snapped photos of them at the surface before. What's been lacking until now has been any observation of the creatures in their natural deep-water habitat. This is so huge! Five year-old me is positively giddy about this. So is 26 year-old me. Now all we need to do is find evidence of a living Carcharodon Megalodon.
Also, how come nobody ever told me there was a such thing as a colossal squid?
The other thing is that Tom Delay is officially being indicted. And it looks like Abramoff is next, but maybe for something a little more sinister than conspiracy.
Of course, all the good news is slightly offest by the possibility of hyper-intelligent porpoises armed with toxic darts roaming the open ocean.
Update: Oh, hell yes. Someone has a Squidblog.
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August 03, 2005
Yes, I will be a monkey's uncle, thank you.
Since last November, as a good political moderate, I've tried to extend numerous rhetorical olive branches to the Bush administration. I'm done with that now.
Up to this point in his second term, the president has made great and admirable progress, not just in rebuilding the diplomatic relationships that were destroyed by the unilateralism of his first term, but even in making concessions to quell the rancor of his democratic opponents in Congress. Now with the simple act of appointing John Bolton as US ambassador to the UN during the Senate recess, he's managed to undo all of that. It's hard to imagine one action that could so thoroughly undermine Bush's stature both at home and abroad. If any good will come of this, it'll only be that Bolton won't be able to cause any more damage in the State Department. Indeed, since he was plucked from his position there, we've seen the beginning of the end of the diplomatic freeze-out by North Korea (not that it'll do much good, but that's a whole other thing).
I mean, that really sucks, but that's not even the most infuriating thing the president has done this week. That dubious honor goes to his coming out in support of teaching Intelligent Design in schools. Kudos to whoever thought of the ID rubric as a way to make creationism not sound like creationism so people could get on board without sounding like dogmatic zealots, but rest assured that a zealot is a zealot is a zealot, no matter how soft spoken. The president should be ashamed to count himself in their number.
It's hard to imagine what's the worst thing about ID "theory." Is it the fact that it's unscientific? Could be. Is it that it's false? Maybe.
How about the fact that it's a total intellectual cop-out? People have been trying to pass off this kind of lazy thinking as a legitimate objection to evolution by selection since Darwin's time. Back then they said it was the eye that was supposed to be so complex ("irreducibly complex" in the contemporary parlance) that it must have been designed by God. Now the examples they give are of things that you can only see through microscopes. The technology may've been updated, but the argument hasn't, and it's as bogus as it ever was. Just because you can't figure out how something evolved the way it did, doesn't mean that nobody can or will, and it certainly doesn't mean that God had a hand in it--even if nobody ever figures out how it's supposed to work.
Take for instance the mechanisms of protein synthesis. I think it's incredible that such a perfect machine was able to arise from base chemicals a few trillion years ago. When I say it's "incredible" I mean that I think it's awe-inspiring--not that it's literally in-credible!
Say nobody ever proves Goldbach's Conjecture. Does that mean that every time a number greater than 2 turns out to be the sum of three primes, that God intervened to make it so? I'll bet you a coke that it doesn't.
Obviously that's a slight disanalogy since the standard of proof in math is different than in other sciences, particularly biological sciences. A scientific theory is confirmed by its instances, and disconfirmed by recalicitrant phenomena. Given that, even if nobody ever figures out how a particular biochemical process or structure was selected for out of a set of possible mutations, you have to show that it's impossible for that process or structure to come about in that way if you want to use it as evidence against evolutionary theory. What you don't get to do is assume that it got to be that way because of the Finger of God, and then reason circularly that it disproves anything. I shouldn't have to tell anyone that when your premise and conclusion are the same thing, you haven't achieved much at all.
The fact is that, concerning evidentiary hurdles and standards of proof, there is a bona fide mass of evidence that supports evolution by something like natural selection, and literally no evidence that undermines it.
Unanswered questions don't disprove a damn thing. Quantum mechanics and general relativity are both doing fine despite the fact that we have no idea how they fit together.
It occurs to me that I haven't even mentioned the argument that teaching ID in public schools would violate the establishment clause. I guess that's mostly because it bothers me considerably more that the president wants kids to learn something so egregiously unscientific than it does that teaching it to them would be unconstitutional (which it would be).
Obviously this discussion has been going on in some form or another since Darwin's time, but with the occasional exception (i.e. the Scopes trial), it's always on the fringe. By throwing his hat in the ring, Mr. Bush has pulled this subject right into the political mainstream. If it were at all possible to use this opportunity to kill the subject once and for all, I'd welcome the president's intervention. However, I don't see that happening. As such, I can't help but express my deepest disappointment that in addition to making it impossible for chlidren to achieve the already depressingly low educational goals we've set for them, the president now wants to eliminate those goals altogether by claiming that the high watermark of human inquiry was, in fact, created by the Noachian flood.
Posted by matt at 09:29 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
April 29, 2005
Quick Beverage Review
Budweiser's B to the E was introduced to me a month or so ago via the intrepid investigative reporting of Whatevs.org. I finally drank some (3.5) yesterday, and I have to say, it's pretty goddamn good. It tastes like the perfectly logical and natural blend of beer and artificial raspberry flavors (really, it was only a matter of time before 'malt-flavor' was a trait naturally selected for in certain species of berry). B to the Eth power is quite a drink, good for situations when you want to engage in some low-impact drinking (dentist appointments, 7+ hour drives, etc.). However, I'd like to add that the press release Budweiser has up (aforeposted link) is hilarious- devour this excerpt: "contemporary adults thirst for variety and what's new and our B-to-the-E delivers a beverage that is true to their lifestyles and range of drinking occasions". Water and juice are rendered passe by the B to the E-hemoth! Forsake all other refreshment, contemporary adults!
The other drink which I have personally been loving lately is the semi-new Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper. It tastes like ice cream. A+. Apparently there's also a national tour for the DCV Dr. P, which, huh. I don't really know what to think about that. Does Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper have groupies?
Posted by Kevin at 08:00 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack
April 21, 2005
"What's that you say? The flux capacitor has destabilized the potentiometric gradulometer?"
Man, I love stories like this:
Some smartasses at MIT recently had a paper called "Rooter: A Methodology for the Typical Unification of Access Points and Redundancy" accepted for presentation at a peer-reviewed computer science conference. The trouble is, the contents of the paper were not just a complete fabrication, but were in fact totally meaningless collections of CompSci buzzwords strung together by a computer (Sentences can be grammatically acceptable while being semanitcally meaningless, like Noam Chomsky's famous "Colorless green ideas sleep furiously"). I'm guessing the technology uses augmented transition networks and context-free grammars, or something. Whatever the nuts and bolts, the students did a damn fine job of showing how out of control much of academia has gotten.
You can check out the application on Jeremy Stribling's (one of the students) website. Another example of similar technology is the much-beloved (by me) Postmodernism Generator which gives you a new critical theory paper every time you reload your web browser (and calls to mind the so-called"Sokal Hoax").
(Thanks to Greg LOAG for sending the story along)
In less happy news from the land of the impossibly smart, Professor Saunders Mac Lane died last week at the age of 95. Prof. Mac Lane was instrumental in developing category theory, a branch of abstract algebra that deals with the commonalities between structures in all branches in math and logic. It's fascinating stuff, and it's got tons of applications in and out of math. I'd hate to tell you all of the time I've spent struggling through Prof. Mac Lane's Categories for the Working Mathematician. Despite his preternaturally lucid handing of the arcane subject matter, my being somewhat of a dullard kept me from getting too much out of it. My dimwittedness aside, his impact on many fields will be felt for generations to come.
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January 24, 2005
The Island of Dr. Belichick
Dear Science,
Could you please find a way to breed Tom Brady with Johnny Damon? Thanks!
Love,
MH
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October 14, 2004
Philosophy of Miniature Robots
Yes. Exciting science! Who loves it? Everyone. Nanotechnology will, in all probability, become the most significant development of the 21st century, and there are, of course, various attitudes to take with respect to this: obdurate indifference, frothing anxiety, and cautious optimism, to name just a few. And as with any burgeoning field, there are two (major) schools of thought, both working in a similar direction, but with conflicting ideologies. Dr. Eric Drexler, who heads up the Foresight Institute, and who is just a really fucking smart guy, is the leading man in the investigation of molecular manufacturing, and also the person who has put the most thought into both the applications and dangers (he formulated the 'gray goo' problem, which just talks about how self-replicating nanobots could, if improperly designed, cover the earth in their hot, insatiable mechanical love) of nanotechnology. Howevs, Richard E. Smalley, who is no less than the goddamn Nobel Prize for Chemistry winner of 1996, disagrees with some of Drexler's theories, mostly in the nuts-and-bolts chemistry (his forte, it seems) of the whole thing. Smalley posits that molecular manufacturing will require a much finer 'touch', as it were, than Drexler's hypothetical nanobots could ever possess. Surprisingly, it's a little more complex than what we've presented here, but let's stop for a minute to think about how cool it would be to have air-conditioned clothes (post-cloth-mask Cobra Commander stylee). Or metallic blood. Anyway, check out the full text of Smalley and Drexler's open letter exchange here. Best line, from Smalley: "You are still in a pretend world..." Ooh, burn!
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September 30, 2004
Our Phone Voice is So Hot
SCIENCE has proven what many of us already knew: that you can get a good idea of how attractive someone is based solely on the sound of their voice. We have to say that, going on anecdotal evidence alone, the most successful telemarketers are often the most physically appealing, and now that research has shown this suspicion to be accurate, Capital One, Verizon, and others of their ilk can begin recruiting and hiring more of the mellifluous-voiced (i.e. 'hot') and viciously discriminating against the cackler/nicotine-singed (i.e. 'nasty') speakers of the world. It makes us proud to live in a country where people receive grants to do this kind of work.
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July 29, 2004
Sad News
One of the brightest lights of 20th century science has been extinguished. Francis Crick, physiology Nobelist and co-discoverer (with James Watson) of the double helical structure of DNA, died last night after a long battle with cancer.
While most people know Crick for his work on DNA, for much of the latter half of the last century he worked in neuroscience and consciousness studies. But whether he is remembered for his efforts to unlock the secrets of the mind or for his pioneering work on the structure of genetic material, Crick is unquestionably one of the greatest scientific minds of this or any age.
Here's a quick biography of Crick from the Nobel site.
Posted by matt at 10:30 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
June 28, 2004
No Low-Carb Babies
Even if common sense and modern medicine aren't enough to keep people from doing Atkins, Nature has conspired to make sure that the next generation will be Atkins-free.
Researchers at the University of Colorado have performed a study that demonstrates an impairment of embryonic and fetal development in mice whose diets consist of 25% protein. For human women, similar problems would likely start when diets contain around 30% protein.
This could present a significant problem for women on high-protein diets like, say, Atkins. Of course, there isn't actually a lower bound on the amount of protein one can eat on Atkins, but if you're not eating bread, pasta, or fruit, then there's not very much let to eat besides high-protein foods.
So, between this and the attendant cardiac problems posed by diets high in saturated fats (e.g. meat, bacon, and butter which are all highly recommended by Atkins), maybe it's time to settle down with the low-carb thing, and start counting calories and exercising.
Posted by matt at 10:21 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
June 07, 2004
Art and Science Converge?
Envisioning Science, a new book by MIT researcher Felice Frankel, urges scientists to consider the aesthetic aspects of the images they produce in their research. It has also sparked a mini-debate about how much art should be found in the scientific image. Eric Heller, a colleague of Frankel's at MIT, has been working hard at creating representations of his own investigations that pass aesthetic muster.
Looking at the images in Heller's gallery, however, one is immediately struck by their overwhelming nerdiness. At best, they look like blacklight posters. More often, though, they have the look of the early, clumsy attempts at computer-generated 3-D "art" that your high-school computer teacher had calendars of. Those old pictures, just like these new scientifically-created ones, had bizarre, unreflective palletes which only made them seem cold and alien. Perhaps that was the intent of some of the first generation of computer artists, but by now there ought to be a movement towards a synthesis of the computational and the organic.
For our money, the acme of scientific art has got to be Vesalius. His De Humani Corporis Fabrica (On the Fabric of the Human Body) not only revolutionized the science of anatomy (he was the first person to systematically document human dissections), but also serves as an early touchstone of naturalism in scientific renderings. His engravings capture every minute corner of a human body while situating them in the context of a whole body that was once a whole person. Until contemporary scientists can match this level of care, the images they produce, while they may be thought-provoking, will never be art.
Posted by matt at 10:55 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
April 21, 2004
Doctors Want a Fatter America
A report issued by the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) shows that American primary care physicians are not advising their patients to lose weight. In fact, only 40% of doctors told patients to slim down in 2000, which, according to the CDC, is a 42.5% drop from 1994.
See? Now this just proves our theory that the American Medical Association is in league with the snack food industry. We should've seen this coming when we had a check-up and the doctor told us that we had dangerously low levels of frosting in our blood.
Or maybe America's doctors are just big time chubby chasers, and want a fatter country from which they can choose their sexual conquests. If we're right about that (and the latest in magic 8-ball technology says we are), then that's just sick! You hear us, you so-called medical "professionals"?! It's sick, and we're on to you!
"CDC: Fewer doctors urge weight loss" (CNN)
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April 07, 2004
"Take a left at Cognitive Neuroscience, and bear right until you hit Quantum Electrodynamics"
Hot on the heels of yesterday's page-turner about pure math, we've got another item of strongly parochial "interest." In the most recent Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, leading scientists from various fields discuss the prospects for a new "map of science," to be taken literally as a graphic representation of the myriad avenues of scientific inquiry and their mutual interrelations. This might be the best idea ever, considering how fluid the boundaries between the sciences are becoming, with ideas from Nonlinear Physics taking root in physiology and neuroscience (and everywhere else), and Biological theories inspiring new directions in Physics and Computer Science. If careful study can effectively map the relations between all of these disciplines, it will give researchers a better idea of who to consult if they think their theories have implications or corollaries in other branches of inquiry.
Of course, this exercise in intellectual cartography will undoubtedly pique the interest of postmodern science warriors, who will see this as an admission that scientific inquiry is just as context-dependent as literary interpretation or whatever it is that those people think. Clearly, however, such lines of argument will be wholly misguided, since the function of the map will be purely heuristic, and will not show any conceptual dependence of one discipline on another.
Anyhoo, we think all of this is just peachy. If we were feeling sanguine, we'd say that it represents the potential for a new era of intellectual unity and consilience. But then, were we feeling cynical, we'd just say that science is entirely too compartmentalized, and scientists entirely too closed-minded, to let something like this get off the ground. Fortunately, it feels like Spring today, so we're inclined towards the former. Don't worry though, once thet refuse to put Philosophy on there, we'll switch right back to the latter.
"Scientists seek 'map of science'" (BBC)
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April 06, 2004
Like Comparing Apples and 01001100s
A paper by University of Pittsburgh mathematician, Thomas Hales, is finally going to be published after having spent six years in review. Why did it take so long for the paper to make it through the review process? Well, because it hits on a controversy which sits at the heart of post-millenial math, namely the debate over the proper role of computers in theorem proving.
Hales has used some machines to prove a theorem known as "Kepler's Conjecture" which states that the best way to pack oranges in a crate is in the form of a pyramid. The result seems intuitively obvious, but self-evidence rarely squares well with mathematical rigor.
Apart from being an interesting (right? RIGHT?) case study in how technology is affecting the intellectual development of our species, the issue is one of the few points at which abstract issues in the philosophy of math overlap with practical considerations of the methodology of working mathematicians. At the heart of the matter is the question of whether mathematicians should be allowed to advert to alternative methods of proof beyond the classical deductive and inductive methods. Powerful computers allow theorists to, in essence, do all (or an extrememly large number) of the calculations "by hand," as it were, to check whether a theorem holds in all of those cases. Obviously, this method was unavailable to mathematicians of bygone eras. But the question remains of whether it meets the standards of rigor that we require of our more traditional kinds of proof, especially when, by their very nature, these new proofs can't be checked by humans.
We here at greenideas are very far from having any strong intuitions one way or the other on this one, but this stuff is at the cutting edge of math and philosophy, and whichever way it goes will undoubtedly have massive implications for the future of scientific inquiry. Still, if we had to pick a horse to bet on, we'd just point out that people who stand in the way of using computers for a novel purpose almost inevitably end up as footnotes in the books by the advocates of new technology.
If you made it all the way to the end of this post, give yourself three gold stars.
"In Math, Computers Don't Lie. Or Do They?" (NYT)
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March 24, 2004
Hypergraphia, or "Blogger's Disease"
In her new book, Harvard neuroscientist, Alice Flaherty, chronicles her struggles with hypegraphia, a psychiatric condition which compels those who have it to write incessantly.
The condition is often associated with Temporal Lobe Epilepsy (TLE) as well as with Bipolar disorder and other forms of depression. Dr. Flaherty's first encounter with the disease was while she suffered from postnatal depression after prematurely giving birth to twins who subsequently died. Sylvia Plath had it during severe PMS. No, really.
Interestingly, TLE also occasionaly produces intense spiritual or religious feelings. This aspect of the disease, coupled with the hypergraphia, raises some interesting questions about the inspiration for Dostoyevsky's ouvre. Van Gogh also had TLE, and hypergraphia could explain the way he compulsively planned each of his paintings.
Should Dr. Flaherty ever need research subjects, she would do well to pick at random from the blogging community. Personally, greenideas would be delighted to have a disease in common with Dostoyevsky... well, probably just this one.
"Telling a tale with too many words" (Guardian Unlimited)
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March 22, 2004
Philosophy Can Make You Sane?
Right. And we suppose being good at math can get you laid.
Still, Lou Marinoff, author of Plato, Not Prozac and professor of Philosophy at City College, seems to think that there is some benefit in using philosophical methods to solve everyday problems.
We think that's pretty crazy. Yes, philosophers are trained in rigorous methods of critical thinking, and people tend to make fewer problems for themselves when they think critically about important decisions and events in their lives. But if we find ourselves in the throes of an anxiety attack, woe to the egghead who tells us it's because were stuck in a hermeneutical circle.
Seriously, Philosophy is good for lots of things (and not the things most people think). Philosophy is the mother of the sciences, political theory, mathematics, and most everything that's contributed to the development of civilization. What it's not good for is being a psychological panacea.
It's people like Marinoff who perpetuate the stereotype of Philosophers as know-it-all types who sit around contemplating The Meaning of Life or whatever. While there certainly are people doing that sort of thing, there are also lots of us working on important questions that have answers.
The moral of this tirade is just that, if someone tells you "Philosophy is the answer," and the question isn't something like "How do we go about justifying inductive generalizations?," just walk away, man.
Posted by matt at 04:38 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
March 15, 2004
CA City Lawmakers 'All Wet'
Officials in the city of Aliso Viejo, CA managed to get suckered by the howler about the dangers of 'dihydrogen monoxide' (DHMO) that's been circulating at least as long as there's been an internet. Upon learning that DHMO (alternatively, "hyrodgen hydroxide," "H20," or, you know, "water"), which has led to countless deaths throughout human history, was used in the production of styrofoam cups, the Aliso Viejo City Council introduced legislation to ban the perilous drinkware.
Upon learning of the gaffe, embarrassed officials withdrew the legislation, although they plan to reintroduce a similar law at a later date.
"Calif. Officials Nearly Fall for H20 Hoax" (Yahoo! News)
Snopes on Dihydrogen Monoxide
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March 10, 2004
A Sad Day for Oppressed Nerds Everywhere
It turns out that bullies really are much better off than the kids they beat up.
Those of you who were bullied as kids no doubt remember being told by your parents that the only reason people pick on you is because they have low self-esteem, and want to make themselves feel better by pounding the snot out of you. A new study in the journal Pediatrics shows that bullies really have no such self-image problems, and were pretty much just beating you up because it was funny. As the study's authors say, out of all of the children who were interviewed, "bullies were psychologically strongest and enjoyed high social standing among their classmates."
As much as these findings go against conventional wisdom, we have to say that we always had trouble seeing how the kids administering swirlies, wedgies, and purple nurples could have had self-confidence issues. It takes a very self-assured young person to put the face of another young person into a toilet.
"Bullying Among Young Adolescents: The Strong, the Weak, and the Troubled" (Pediatrics)
"Machiavelli for Twelve-Year Olds" (The Altlantic)
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March 04, 2004
The Seedy Underbelly of the Scientific Establishment
Okay, so maybe scientists aren't so all-fired great after all. A new report by the Comittee on Publishing Ethics provides a laundry list of ethical infractions by publishing scientists, ranging from plagiarism, to bribery, to... murder (okay, we made that last one up). Probably the worst offense came from the medical researchers who illicitly took blood samples from healthy babies to act as a control group in a study they were conducting.
Now, we realize we haven't weighed in on this issue before, so let us state our postion on the matter as plainly as possible: stealing blood from babies is wrong, and no one should ever do it (aren't you glad you've got greenideas to help you sort through these complicated ethical issues?).
Seriously though, you should at least check out the Nature article (linked below). It's almost funny how scary some of this stuff is (or is it almost scary how funny it is? No, it's the first one. Definitely the first one).
Also, if you like the mad scientist pic, it's from exploding dog, and there's plenty more where that came from.
"Scientists behaving badly" (Nature)
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Once Again, Science Takes Direction from 'The Simpsons'
Mario Beaureagard, a neuroscientist at the University of Montreal, is investigating some of the neurophysiological aspects of religious experience. Of course it invloves lots of fMRIs, and PET scans, and whatnot, but it also involves mescaline. Beauregard is studying the effects of the drug in the hopes of understanding what goes on in the brain when people experience Unio Mystica, a connection with God. He hopes that the spirititual feelings often reported by mescaline users will shed some light on the similar experiences of those who have not taken the drug, typically people within the organizations of chruches (nuns, clergy, etc.) when they are in their 20s.
Those of us who watch 'The Simpsons' religiously know that, sometimes, similar effects can be achieved by ingesting certain 'Guatemalan insanity peppers' and can provide cryptic insights into the nature of our personal lives. Of course, we also know that, should Beauregard's study conclude something we find unfavorable, we can always meet his claims with the challenge: "In your face, space coyote!"
"A mystical union" (The Economist)
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March 01, 2004
Weekly Bush Administration Science Rant
A handful of science journals are now refusing to publish papers by scientists from Cuba, Iran, Libya, and Sudan. The decision is due to a Treasury Department ruling which says that to do so would violate US embargos against those countries.
The thing is, there's probably no legal reason to do so. Some journals are planning to cite the first amendment in defense of their right to publish whatever findings they deem appropriate, regardless of the researchers' country of origin. Besides the constitutional issue, there is the fact that the embargos are trade embargos. Under the letter of the law, certain intellectual property ("information and informational materials") is exempt from the restrictions.
Furthermore, there's really no practical reason to do so. If Iraninan scientists want to publish their state-funded research in American journals, why not let them? It's not like American scientists are clamoring to publish their nuclear science research in Iranian journals ('cause that would be illegal).
So really, this is just one more way in which the Bush administration is artificially limiting scientific progress. Someone really ought to tell John Snow that Cuba really doesn't have the money to do stem cell research that could infect US scientific publications. Fortunately (for everyone who's not a theocrat), South Korea does. Maybe we should have an embargo against them, too.
"Publishers split over response to US trade embargo ruling" (Nature)
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February 26, 2004
Monkeys' Immunity to AIDS
Researchers at the Dana-Farber Institute at Harvard have made a striking discovery concerning an innate immunity to HIV in monkeys. The researchers found that a certain protein (specifically, the TRIM5-alpha protein) found in monkeys' cells, in fact prevents HIV cells from shedding their capsids, the hard outer shells of the viruses, thus keeping them from releasing their genetic material into the host cells.
It's way too early to speculate too much about what possibilities this discovery might hold for treatment of human AIDS patients, but we would imagine that, if such an avenue of research were to prove fruitful, it would be in an analagous way to current protease inhibitor therapies which prevent the virus from reproducing. Still, it seems like it would be rather difficult to induce the production of similar proteins in human cells, so it might not lead to any new treatment modalities at all--at least not directly.
Okay, so there's really nothing all that funny about any of this, but you've got to admit it's really cool. Plus, we haven't had any monkey-related stories in a while, so we were about due. Plus, how cute is that little guy up top?
"Cell Protein Gives Monkeys Innate Immunity to HIV, Researchers Discover" (NYT)
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February 19, 2004
Georgia OKs "Evolution"
In a move which puts Georgia schools at the cutting edge of 19th century science, the Georgia Board of Education voted unanimously in favor of keeping the word "evolution" in its state curriculum. The ruling comes after State Superintendent, Kathy Cox, said that all occurances of "evolution" in state curricula should be replaced with "biological changes over time."
To be fair, that is one crazy woman (and the crazy people she represents) in a state which clearly values education, as the BoE decision clearly shows. Nonetheless, we can't fathom how this is still an issue today. Not that we're all that into the Jeebus thing, but we think the idea that faith and rational belief in science can peacefully coexist has been borne out in 50 or so years of, well, peaceful coexistence. What's next? Is the President going to come right out and say that marriage is something that can only exist between between a man and a woman? What? Oh, man... we need a nap.
"Education board approves use of 'evolution'" (CNN)
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See? Bush Hates Science
In a report issued yesterday, the Union of Concerned Scientists accused the Bush Administration of having "suppressed and distorted scientific analysis from federal agencies, and taken actions that have undermined the quality of scientific advisory panels."
Among the specific charges, was the claim that the administration supressed an EPA report that showed that the bipartisan Senate Clean Air bill would more effectively reduce mercury contamination in fish, and simply prevent more human deaths, than would the administration's own Clean Skies Act. Other alleged infractions include misrepresenting scientific consensus concerning global warming, and supressing studies on condom use.
The signitories of the report include several Nobel laureates, including physicists, Leon Lederman and Steven Weinberg, and National Science Medalists, such as pioneering Sociobiologist, Edward O. Wilson.
Long-time readers of greenideas will know that we have a preternatural hatred of the Bush adminitstration's cavalier attitude towards scientific inquiry. For instance, look here and here.
"Scientists Say Administration Distorts Facts" (NYT)
"Preeminent Scientists Protest Bush Administration's Misuse of Science" (Union of Concerned Scientists)
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"Is that a 750mL buret in your pocket, or..."
Internet dating has found its way into a whole new niche market. New services, such as Science Connection, are designed to hook up lonely scientists who don't have, shall we say, conventional social networks. So far, the site boasts over 100 marriages or engagements.
Ladies, in the interests of catalyzing this little scene, we dug around Science Connection and found this catch:
Lavin314159265
Location: Springfield, USA
Occupuation: Freelance Inventor
Interests: Flying Motorcycles, Death Rays, Hamburger Earmuffs
Favorite Movies: "The Nutty Professor", "The Bellboy", "The Patsy," "The King of Comedy"
Turn-Offs: Debigulators, Killer Robots
Turn-Ons: Rebigulators, Mood Pants
On Computer Dating: "Computer matches would
be so perfect as to eliminate the thrill of romantic
conquest. Mw-hurgn-whey."
"Unity is the lonliest integer" (Nature)
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February 16, 2004
Even Science Hates Microsoft
Experts in the field of computer security are taking a fresh look at an old theory of evolutionary biology, namely that genetic diversity within a species is essential to its survival. The application to the computer world being that the Microsoft monoculture is uniquely susceptible to security breaches, since each Wintel machine has essentially the same security holes. The point is being driven forcefully home by the havoc wrought by viruses like Sobig and MyDoom. These viruses exclusively affect machines running Windows, leaving Linux and Mac users smirking on the sidelines.
Dan Geer, a computer security expert with a doctorate in biostatistics, was fired from his position at @stake, a Cambridge, MA tech firm, for publishing a paper which advanced just this idea. Microsoft has denied putting any pressure on @stake to fire Geer.
When Bill Gates was approached for comment, the odor of brimstone and goat's blood emanating from under his door frightened away any potential interrogators.
On behalf of Mac users everywhere, we told you so.
"Microsoft dominance poses security threat" (CNN)
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February 06, 2004
Pickled Dragon?
A man in Oxfordshire, England made an interesting discovery in his own garage: a pickled dragon in a jar. Experts speculate that the indiarubber "dragon" was made by 19th century German scientists in an attempt to discredit the English scientific establishment.
We wonder how 19th century scientists could have had the time to come up with such an elaborate hoax. We always assumed that they had their plates full with all of their research into the inferiority of non-Europeans and how to makes tighter, stronger corsets.
"Pickled dragon mystery" (SMH)
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February 04, 2004
Gross Science: Huge Prehistoric Bugs
There have been some interesting (read: creepy and gross) developments in the rough and tumble world of speculative paleontology. Researchers have been putting together the pieces of a picture of a Carboniferous era populated by huge insects and spiders. Imagine a spider two feet around, a dragonfly with a two-foot wingspan, and a five-foot-long millipede. Now imagine the scope of our nightmares in the coming nights.
The research, which involves close study of a scant fossil record as well as experiments with atmospheric concentrations on present day insects (and other arthropods), suggests that the respiratory systems of these creatures allowed them to thrive in the oxygen-rich Carboniferous atmosphere. Further, the lack of predators also contributed to the frightening proportions of the organisms.
When we can get past our revulsion at the thought of a millipede that is almost as tall as we are, we have to admit that this is pretty fascinating stuff. Nonetheless, the images that are now ingrained in our psyche will surely force us to take up the fight against the creepy crawlies at greenideas HQ with renewed zeal.
"When Giants Had Wings and Six Legs" (NYT)
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February 01, 2004
The Incredible Singing Black Hole
Imagine that, somewhere in the universe, there is a gigantic supermassive celestial body that is quietly singing to itself. What is it singing? Actually, it's a B-flat ostinato.
A black hole in the Perseus cluster is emitting a series of notes by creating pressure waves. It turns out that these waves have a frequency that, were they audible, would be pitched at a B flat, 57 octaves below middle C.
The period of the oscillation (the time it takes to complete one wave cycle) is about 10M years, so it pretty much beats the pants off of that Cage thing they're doing in Germany right now, but maybe that's being unfair (although the universe did think of it first).
We'll choose not to wax all pseudo-mystical about this (unlike the NYT story linked below), but we have to admit that we're pretty much blown away by the scale of this thing. This huge black hole, 250M light years away, is sending out these moans that last for 10M years. If we weren't completely overwhelmed by how impossibly big this whole thing is, it would probably be pretty beautiful.
"The Speculative Case for a Cosmic B Flat" (NYT)
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January 31, 2004
Slander and Lies, I Tells Ya!
A new study by the UCLA Center for Communication Policy claims that internet users are not geeks. Seriously. The study found that, rather than being solitary creatures, given to spending Mountain Dew Code-Red-fueled hours alone in front of the interweb machine, internet users are more likely to engage in social interaction and spend less time watching television than nonusers.
The nerve of some people, suggesting that we actually have normal, healthy relationships with real people instead of being pathologically addicted to scouring the web for the latest dish on Tina Brown.
Next thing you know, some joker is going to say that indie rock dorks may occasionally talk to girls, and aren't amassing their vast knowledge of musical minutiae in order to feel superior to the squares who get their music from American Idol and Hot 97.
Nah.
"'Geek' image an urban myth" (silicon.com)
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January 29, 2004
Monkeys Love Doin' It!
Psychologists at the University of Wisconsin-Madison studying male marmoset monkeys have found that smelling "sexy scents" (which we assume means the smells of grape MD 20/20 and new leather on the backseat of a '73 Dodge Dart) causes a surprising amount of neuronal activity throughout many areas of the brain. The study, performed using fMRI scans, showed that when the monkeys got all hot and bothered, many higher cognitive areas were activated, including those which control decision-making, emotion-processing, and cognitive control.
The researchers added that the fMRI results were strikingly similar to those of human males, but we could've told them that.
Apart from lending some credence to the adage that men like to think with their guy parts, this study provides a fascinating window into the underappreciated world of monkey sex, and will also help us to make our weekly quota of monkey stories.
"Study: Male monkeys approach sex head first" (CNN)
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Manic Panic
Researchers at Yale University have linked some hair dyes to an increased risk of certain types of cancer. Specifically, in a study of 1,300 women, those who started dyeing their hair before 1980 were 40% more likely to develop non-hodgkins lymphoma.
The good news is that the carcinogens were removed at the dawn of the 'Me Decade', so those of us who were too young to be dyeing our hair back then are home free.
This is especially good considering, after we gave up cigarettes and stopped going to those x-ray bars, dyeing our hair was one of the few things we could still do to look cool. Thanks, Science! Now we just need to get all those kids in Williamsburg to stop eating those lead paint chips.
"Study Reveals Hair Dye, Cancer Link" (BostonChannel.com)
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January 28, 2004
The Oldest Disgusting Thing Ever
Scientists working at the National Museum of Scotland and Yale have determined that a fossilized millipede probably lived on land, making it the oldest known animal to have done so.
The researchers have had the fossil, found just north of Aberdeen, for three years, but have only just now discovered small pinholes on the insect that they believe allowed the vile beast to breathe air, making it likely that the creepy crawly lived on land.
Greenideas' official policy on millipedes of all ages is that they are just really scary and gross.
Seriously though, the thing died 420 million years ago, but we still hate it. Is it on me? I feel like it's on me.
"Fossil millipede found to be oldest land creature" (CNN)
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January 22, 2004
Study Shows That Lazy=Smart
Finally, the scientific community has learned the Good News. No, not that Jeebus business, the gospel of which we speak is the one which says that sleeping in is a good way to foster good cognitive functioning. Researchers at the University of Lubeck in Germany gave test subjects a string of numbers along with two operations to perform on them and asked them to generate another string. In addition, a shortcut algorithim could be used to get the answer, but the subjects had to figure that out on their own. One group was allowed to get a full night's sleep, while the other group was kept awake. The sleepers were twice as good as the red-eyes at getting the shortcut.
Greenideas' collegiate readers should take this study to heart when considering signing up for that 8 a.m. calc section. More importantly for the working stiffs out there is the possibility of calling in smart to work and then rolling in around 11:30.
"Experiment Shows You Really Should 'Sleep On It'" (Scientific American)
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Great, Now Machines Know More About Love Than I Do
In a move which proves that the high-tech market is driven entirely by James Bond films, an Israeli technological firm has announced that it has developed lie-detector glasses. Initially conceived for use in law-enforcement and airport security settings, the technology will first be made available to consumers. The glasses work by analyzing the subject's speech patterns, and then flashing a red light to indicate a lie, or a green light to show that the subject is telling the truth.
As cool/scary as that is, we are more interested in the other applications of similar technology. Other speech-analysis algorithms are currently being used in so-called "love detectors" which attach to phone lines, or are software-based additions to PDAs. By taking a subject's normal speech as data, these devices can tell you how much that person "loves" you.
Greenideas would be absolutely terrified to own such a contraption, partly because we are quite happy not knowing what people really think of us, but mostly because we would have to constantly keep replacing the "just friends" indicator due to heavy use.
"Lie-Detector Glasses Offer Peek at Future of Security" (EE Times)
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January 20, 2004
Yabba Dabba Doo!
In a discovery which can only be labeled "really cool," archaeologists have discovered the complete skull of a mammoth in southern England. The skull, which has been determined to be that of an elderly (25-40 yrs.) female, is estimated to be about 50,000 years old.
We can only hope that this discovery will foster further archaeological expeditions in the area until paleontologists can get ahold of the holy grail of their discipline: the Flintstones' pterodactyl lawnmower thingy.
"Complete Mammoth Skull Unearthed" (BBC)
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Quadraplegic Astrophysicists, Beware!
We here at greenideas are extremely dismayed to learn that nerd-bullying respects neither age nor renown. Police in Cambridge are launching an inquiry into some suspicious bruises on Stephen Hawking, possibly the world's most famous living physicist, and holder of the Lucasian Chair in Physics at Cambridge University. Police, as well as Hawking's children, suspect that one of the physicist's caregivers may be harming him in order to bring attention on him/herself. The phenomenon is known to Psychologists (and rabid "ER" fans) as Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy.
Having some nerdish proclivities ourselves, we now realize that we are living on borrowed time. We will certainly be on the lookout for crazed nerd-hating nurse-practicioners the next time we are walking home late at night.
"Hawking Ex Tells of Fear" (Daily Mirror UK)
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How Do Monkeys Smell?
Quite well, actually. Researchers at the Max Planck Institue for Evolutionary Anthropology in Leipzig have determined that, due to mutation, humans have lost 60% of our 1000 olfactory receptor-making genes, whereas New World monkeys have lost only 20% these genes (Old World monkeys have lost 30%). It is thought that, among other things, this olfactory acuity allows these monkeys to use their sense of smell to distinguish ripe fruit from unripe. Greenideas wishes we had such an advantage when digging through piles of limes at Key Food in order to best garnish our gin & tonics.
We here at greenideas are trying with every fiber of our low-brow being to avoid making a joke about monkey poo. It's extremely difficult, but we will restrain ourselves for the greater good.
With two monkey-related posts in twelve hours, we are happy to be reporting the cutting edge of monkey research. Not that we are especially interested in monkeys, but we do rather like typing "monkey" into Google Image Search.
"What's That Smell? Better Ask a Monkey" (NYT)
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January 19, 2004
Sometimes, It's "Monkey Hear, Monkey Not Do Very Much At All"
Psychologists are on their way to verifying something that linguists and philosophers have known for decades: that the human language faculty is largely dependent on our ability to cognize recursive rules. That is, we fancier primates can understand rules that take themselves as input. The findings of the researchers at Harvard and the University of St. Andrews, suggest that it is lower primates' inability to process such rules that makes them incapable of learning anything like human language.
Greenideas wonders why so much grant money goes to determining the extent of monkeys' ability to learn language when it would be much better spent on dressing them up in funny clothes and making them dance for bananas. Dance, monkey, dance!
"Puzzled Monkeys Reveal Key Language Step" (New Scientist)
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January 17, 2004
So that's why my brain hurts all the time
So it turns out that cell phones might actually be as bad for you as those insufferable worrywarts in the rational scientific community have said all along. Exposing rats to two hours of microwave raditation from GSM phones has caused demonstrable ill-effects on the rats' neurological health, including neuronal shrinkage and ruptured blood vessels. Greenideas is skeptical of any scientific discovery that actually condones those obnoxious "hands-free" earpiece thingies, but we also enjoy our brains with as few holes as possible, thank you.
Posted by matt at 02:20 PM | Comments (0)
Hubble Hubbub
We at greenideas are shocked and saddened (well, saddened) about the consequences of Bush's newfangled election-year resolution to put people back on the moon by 2015, and to make it to Mars by, well, sometime after that. As a result of this shift in priorities, all maintainence operations on the Hubble telescope will be discontinued, which will allow the telescope to become completely non-functional by 2010. Thanks to the Hubble, we know the age of the universe, that the universe is expanding at an accelerating rate, and lots of other very important things. NASA had hoped to replace the Hubble with a fancier telescope, but that project will be tabled indefinitely due to Bush's New Plan for Space Stuff.
For the full story, click
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